When life becomes overwhelming or you're facing a particularly stressful week, it can feel like you're losing control.
It's as if you're a small ship being tossed around in a turbulent and chaotic sea.
Not a pleasant experience, for sure.
During these times, I find it beneficial to start by focusing on deep, slow breathing. Simply pay attention to your breath as it goes in and out for a minute or two.
This helps to calm your body and slow down the racing thoughts in your mind.
Afterward, shift your focus to what you can control. Concentrate on what actions you can take to improve a situation and move forward.
In this post, I'll share some tips and habits that have personally helped me in regaining a sense of control. I hope you find them useful as well.
Let's begin by examining what aspects of life you can and cannot control.
Focus on what you can control
Some common things you can control include:
Your actions.
You have control over what actions you take or refrain from, your daily habits, and the path you choose to follow.
Your communication.
You can control the conversations you engage in, the words and tone you use, and the energy you bring into interactions.
Your priorities.
You have the power to allocate time to different tasks, prioritize relationships, manage your energy, and balance work and personal life.
Your boundaries.
You can set boundaries for what you accept from others and yourself, conserving energy for what truly matters to you.
Your self-care.
Taking care of your health, exercising, eating well, getting enough rest, and engaging in hobbies contribute to long-term happiness and success.
Your attitude and perspective.
You control how you respond to setbacks, take action, and approach daily situations and life events.
Your personal growth.
Setting goals, working towards self-improvement, and striving for personal development are within your control.
What you receive and give.
You choose the information and viewpoints you allow into your mind and how you contribute to the lives of others.
What you cannot control
There are things you typically cannot control, such as:
Other people's actions and words.
You have no control over how others behave, their opinions, or their feelings towards you.
The past.
You cannot change what has already happened, but you can learn from it.
The future.
While you can influence the future through your actions, trying to control it leads to worry and anxiety.
Unpredictable forces.
Global events, accidents, and natural occurrences are beyond your control.
Understanding what you can and cannot control can provide clarity during stressful times and reduce feelings of helplessness.
Now, let's explore ten more tips and habits to help you regain a sense of control.
1. Remember the importance of prioritization.
You have limited time and energy each day, so it's crucial to focus on what truly matters.
While it's natural to dwell on negative situations for a while, shifting your focus to what you can control is essential to avoid feeling powerless and negative.
Create reminders to stay mindful of this. Whether it's a whiteboard message or a note on your phone, these reminders can help you maintain perspective.
2. Question the situation.
When faced with a negative situation, ask yourself:
Will this matter in the long run?
Consider the significance of the situation in the grand scheme of things to gain a broader perspective.
Is this my responsibility to resolve?
Determine whether the situation is within your control or if it belongs to someone else.
Can I realistically control this situation?
Avoid trying to control every situation, as it can lead to unnecessary stress and exhaustion.
Reflect on past experiences.
Look back on how similar situations have resolved in the past to avoid repeating the same mistakes.
3. Take action.
Once you've identified a situation you can influence, take action by:
Determine a small step you can take to initiate progress.
Break down the action into smaller, manageable tasks to prevent procrastination.
Change your mood by engaging in activities like walking, working out, or taking a shower to boost motivation.
Set a goal to accomplish one small task each day to maintain momentum.
4. Keep progressing.
Build upon your initial action by creating a detailed plan to address the situation effectively.
Utilize the confidence gained from your small win to propel yourself forward.
Take control of your life by mapping out steps to achieve your goals.
5. Remember your influence.
Even in situations beyond your control, you can manage your words, actions, and attitude.
Focusing on what you can control allows you to navigate challenges more effectively.
Refer to the list of controllable aspects to find areas where you can exert influence.
6. Monitor your influences.
Avoid sources of negativity that impact your mood and outlook on life.
Identify the top sources of negativity in your life and take steps to limit exposure to them.
Allocate time to interact with positive influences and engage in activities that promote well-being.
7. Prioritize self-care.
In challenging situations, prioritize self-care to improve your mental and emotional well-being.
Engage in activities that help you relax, recharge, and maintain a positive outlook.
Allocate time for self-care, such as exercising, talking to someone, or planning enjoyable activities.
8. Learn to assert boundaries.
Enhance your ability to say no to avoid overcommitting and feeling powerless.
Focus on setting boundaries that align with your goals and well-being.
Kindly decline offers and prioritize your own needs without feeling guilty.
9. Practice letting go.
Release thoughts and situations beyond your control to conserve energy for what truly matters.
Accept your feelings and seek perspective through journaling or talking to someone.
Let go of negative emotions to focus on positive actions that empower you.
10. Cultivate gratitude.
Shift your focus from negativity to gratitude to regain a sense of control and positivity.
Incorporate gratitude practices into your daily routine to foster a more empowered mindset.
Reflect on aspects of your life, relationships, and challenges that you are grateful for.
By embracing gratitude, you can enhance your perspective and take control of your life.
